In a survival scenario, hardly any food is horrible enough to pass on after weeks or months of starving in the hideout. I’d eat anything to survive. Even my wife’s cooking.

The way the pandemic started, I thought that I won’t make it to the end of 2020.

The way the pandemic is ending, I’m now worried about surviving the recession and the upcoming economic collapse.

Either way, I’ll need MREs, I reckon.

I never tasted MREs before the pandemic, and now that I feel reassured my life probably won’t depend on them soon, I can smugly evaluate them as not great, not terrible. At least when compared with burgers, roasted game I hunted with my crossbow, and other delicious stuff.

HOWEVER…

With my mother-in-law visiting since last Friday and Bonnie cooking the old crone’s favorite mac’n’cheese every single day, I am in the mood for reminiscing about (and maybe even disappearing in the forest with) some of the best MREs I’ve had this past year.

But, hooold it for one second.

In case you’re new to the joys of getting ready for the end of the world and don’t know what MRE is, let’s back up. 

Contrary to what an actual soldier might tell you that the MRE stands for “Meals, Rarely Edible” or “Meals, Rejected by Everyone”, it actually means “Meal, Ready-to-Eat.”

Why?

Because they’re pre-cooked and you don’t need kitchen utensils or even hot water to prepare them.   

MREs are primarily used by the military as a food ration for soldiers in the field, when they can’t get to a source of regular, cooked food. They are also distributed to people in disasters like that f***er Katrina years back.

However, there are also civilian MREs that are gaining popularity among proud preppers, campers, hunters, hikers, backpackers, fishermen, and other folks in the wild who can’t be tied down by the fact that there’s no kitchen to prepare or heat up a meal.

Civilian vs. Military MREs: Is There a Difference?

Yes, they’re slightly different.

Military and commercial MREs have slightly different packaging. Military MREs include information that they’re obtained by the Department of Defense and that it’s unlawful to resell them.

Both packaging include information only about the main entrée, so you don’t know what else you’re getting.

Military MREs have more unique entrée options. They have 24 different entrées and about 150 combinations of side dishes.

Civilian MREs usually come in a box of 12 meals consisting of 6 different entrées.

All military MREs include a heater bag that can heat the meals. Some commercial MREs include the heater bag, and some make it an optional (and more costly) choice.

It’s supposedly illegal to sell military MREs to civilians, as it says on the military MRE packaging, but there’s actually no law against it.

So, you can actually get military MREs on eBay, Amazon, army surplus stores, gun shows, or from your friendly neighbor, the U.S. army general. It’s just illegal for military personnel to resell them.

Make sure the meal hasn’t expired. The best way to do that is to use a Julian calendar converter, because the expiration and inspection dates on the packaging show “Julian dates.”

The inspection date on a military MRE is the date when the army inspects the goods to see if they’re still edible and it’s usually about three years after the packaging date.

So, if you buy a product with this year’s inspection date, that means that the packaging has already been out there on the shelves or who knows where and in what conditions for three years, and maybe it’s no longer good to eat.

What’s the Purpose of an MRE?

The MRE’s main purpose is to sustain a guy (or lady! let’s not discriminate) out in the wild with enough nutrients and calories to survive and be able to fight, carry heavy stuff, etc. 

The military MREs contain 1250 calories per meal and soldiers are supposed to eat three of those per day.

They are packed with sodium and very little fiber, so it’s not a good idea to eat them longer than 21 days. If you do, you’ll experience a new, very constipated level of SHTF.

MREs were pretty yucky initially, so when the army bosses realized the soldiers were not eating them and were getting weaker, they had to put some effort into making the survival food more palatable.

And to tell you the truth, the effort paid off. Some MREs out there are not terrible at all and are actually making my mouth water right now.

Where Can You Buy MREs?

If you’re reading this article in December 2021, you may have some trouble finding an MRE because many of them are “currently unavailable” or “out of stock”. When a pandemic hits, food is the first item on most people’s stockpiling lists.

Commercial MREs are easier to buy because you can order them directly from the manufacturer. Military MREs are sold on Amazon, eBay, etc., but many products are currently unavailable. Check back periodically to buy them when they reappear.

(Word of caution when buying military MREs online: they don’t have an expiration date, but an estimated shelf life which depends on the storing conditions. For example, if the MRE for sale has been stored at 70°F consistently, you can expect it to last for about five years from its packaging (NOT inspection!) date.)

(But how do you know it hasn’t been through some extreme weather, desert storms, and other heavy shit? If it’s been sitting at 100°F, it’s likely it stopped being safe to eat after a year. For most people. Except my Bonnie. She’s got a gut made of steel.)

So, What Makes a Good MRE?

Some general rules of classifying an MRE as good include:

1. It’s tasty. For soldiers, this may just mean it doesn’t make them puke.

2. The packaging is lightweight and easy to store and carry.

3. There’s a clear packaging date on the individual food packets!

4. The flameless ration heater is included in the packaging.

5. A nice selection of accessories (M&M’s! Jalapeno cheese spread!) comes with the main meal.

What makes a good MRE also depends on what you need it for.

For example:

If you’re hiking and the only thing you have is your hiking backpack, you’ll want your MRE to include a ration heater and be as light as possible.

If you’re camping near your car, tent, and tons of other civilizational goodies (e.g., a gas stove), you may value a palatable over practical MRE.  

After I read through and watched countless MRE reviews, read comments from war veterans on social media, and tried a whole bunch of MREs this past year, I can only spill out a cliché: Everyone’s taste is different. 

Hence, my best MREs may not be YOUR best MREs.

Still, you’re hearing it from the guy who loves to eat and knows a good bite from a tasteless piece of S.

So, let’s get straight to listing decent MREs and explaining why they’re probably better than anything yo mama ever cooked.

10 Best MREs: Reviews

1.       Chili and Macaroni (Military) – Amazon

2.       Chicken Burrito (Military) – Amazon

3.       Beef Ravioli in Meat Sauce (Military) – Amazon

4.       Chicken, Noodles, and Vegetables in Sauce (Military) – Amazon

5.       AmeriQual Apack 12-pack

6.       Sopakco SurePak 12-pack

7.       XMRE – Vegetarian Taco Pasta

8.       Mountain House – Beef Stew

9.       Wornick Eversafe – Vegetable Lasagna (Civilian)

10.   MRE Star – New Orleans Gumbo with Chicken

1. Chili and Macaroni (Military)

Chili and Macaroni is the ultimate best tasting MRE, based on all the reviews, comments, and those two Chili Mac MRE meals I’ve had so far. In fact, that’s the first MRE I ever tried.

Ripping it open was probably the biggest challenge of prepping and eating it. Luckily I had my survival knife for this survival occasion, because if eating’s not about survival, I don’t know what is (and my Bonnie sure likes to binge-survive!).

Later I discovered that the MRE packaging has a ziplock seal on the top that easily peels apart, but somehow that ziplock slipped my well-trained eye and sharp senses.

This is what comes inside the (finally opened) packaging:

·         The main dish (Chili Mac)

·         Lemon pound cake

·         Jalapeno cheese spread

·         Crackers

·         Beef snacks

·         Candy (Skittles or Tootsie Rolls)

·         Beverage powder

·         Salt

·         Red pepper spice

·         Coffee

·         Accessories – matches, sugar, salt, creamer, red pepper spice, chewing gum, toilet paper, and, of course, spoon

·         Flameless Ration Heater*

*The Flameless Ration Heater is a special pouch where you’re supposed to put your main meal and other things you want to consume hot. When you put the meal inside this heater bag and pour some filtered water (cold, hot, whatever), it starts a chemical reaction that heats the contents.

Follow instructions on the back of the heater bag carefully so you wouldn’t waste your precious meal.

You can also eat the Chili Mac without heating it up, but trust me, you don’t want to do that.

The Jalapeno cheese spread is pure joy and if you mix it with the main dish and then heat them together, you’re in for a rare kind of bliss in the wilderness. Or anywhere, for that matter. Except around a fire that’s roasting a boar. In that case you can toss your Chili Mac.

2. Chicken Burrito (Military)

Here’s another military MRE that’s ranking pretty high when it comes to taste. And calories. And the possibility of shitting out a brick if you eat it for too long. 

Sorry, I hope the image doesn’t stick with you when you go on to read how to best enjoy your Chicken Burrito.

It comes with plain tortillas, chicken and veggies, cinnamon bun, accessories packet (gum, instant coffee, hot sauce, creamer, salt, wet napkin, sweetener, toiler paper), tropical punch beverage powder, corn kernels, cheese spread, and the flameless ration heater.

What I love about this meal is the fantastic range of flavors, from the slightly zesty main dish to the sweet-smelling-and-tasting cinnamon bun and full-flavored tropical beverage. 

If mine was the only vote that counted, this would be the best tasting MRE, beating Chili Mac just slightly.

3. Beef Ravioli in Meat Sauce (Military)

With Beef Ravioli here, it’s more of the same, but with an important distinction in flavor and the side dish variety. 

You’ll find the following with the Beef Ravioli: crackers, hot sauce, Teriyaki beef stick, cheese spread, chocolate banana nut muffin (YUM!), beverage based powder – orange, and the standard accessories kit. And the flameless heater.

Don’t be fooled by the state of the chocolate muffin, once you get to it. Though it may look like three different armies stomped on it, it tastes better than most similar additives-filled sweets in your local grocery store. 

And the rest of the contents deliver on the promise.

The nutritious value of the packaging is similar to other military MREs, about 1250. Two of those are enough during your camping, fishing, hiking, or hiding-from-someone-in-the-woods activity.

4. Chicken, Noodles, and Vegetables in Sauce (Military)

Now, here’s some comfort food when you’re tired of the same old home cooked stuff. The Chicken Noodles MRE comes with:

·         The chicken and noodles entrée

·         A special fudge brownie (trans fat-free , to show us they care about our nutrition, wink wink)

·         Accessories pack, spoon

·         Nut and raisins mix with chocolate disks also known as M&Ms

·         Crackers

·         Cheese spread

·         Beverage powder – grape

·         Flameless Ration Heater

You know all the steps. Heat the contents, eat, drink, and relish the moment.

The crackers and cheese spread are classically good, but I especially like how the chicken in the main meal is tender and how well it goes with the sauce. 

If you close your eyes and forget about the stars above, you may think you’re in a restaurant. That is, if you don’t look at the mushy substance but eat it with still closed eyes.

In moments like these, I wonder why there aren’t more enthusiasts on this planet who turn to hiking, camping, and other outdoor adventures.  

5. AmeriQual Apack 12-Pack (Civilian)

AmeriQual is one of the three main companies that sell military MREs to the Department of Defense.

If you can’t get ahold of any military MREs, AmeriQual Apack offers almost the same meals in their packaging of 12 civilian-style MREs.

Their company doesn’t offer the whole military MRE entrée variety, but they rotate a selection of six delicious meals with every production run, and most are delicious, nutritious, and ready to eat in 10 minutes.

The current selection of six entrees includes:

·         Pasta with Garden Vegetables in Tomato Sauce

·         Pork with Sauce and Rice

·         Homestyle Vegetables in Sauce with Noodles and Chicken

·         Spaghetti with Italian Style Sauce and Meat

·         Sweet and Sour Sauce with Rice and Chicken

·         Sunflower Butter and Jelly

The meals come with different side dishes, salt and seasonings, dessert, spoon, napkin, and the heater bag.

AmeriQual Apack provides reduced-sodium MREs to civilians, so they’re easier to digest than their military counterparts.

6. Sopakco Sure-Pak (Civilian)

Sopakco is another military MRE provider. Just like AmeriQual, they make civilian MREs with similar contents to those in the military packaging.

Civilian Sopakco Sure-Pak comes in a box of 12 meals, so you can expect to find two of beef ravioli, chili mac, vegetable lasagna, cheese tortellini, chicken breast, and similar stuff, depending on the selection in a particular production run. 

The stuff that comes with the main meals is the usual combination of bread or crackers, cheese spread or jelly, dessert, beverage powder, condiments, spoon, coffee, wet towel.

You can choose whether you want the packaging to include the heater pouch or not. The difference in price is $0.75 per individual packaging or $9 for the entire 12-pack.

The civilian Sopakco’s can’t be bad since the main meal is pretty much what you’d get in the military version as well. 

Also, the advantage of buying a civilian MRE from Sopakco is that you’re sure it was stored well in a warehouse at a relatively low temperature prior to heading your way.

As I’m writing this, it says on the Sopakco SurePak website that they’re all out of products. F***ing pandemic! You can try different resellers or private label companies that repack Sopakco’s items and sell them under a different name, e.g. Z-Ration Zombies.

7. XMRE – Vegetarian Taco Pasta (Civilian)

This one’s for you, vegetarian or vegan preppers out there.

The XMRE is a new generation of military-grade MRE producers. They’re not one of the big three U.S. military MRE suppliers, but they’ve been selling survival food to different governments, military, and other institutions around the world for years.

They’re made for people with war, natural disasters, or emergency preparedness on their minds. Or just people who lead adventurous outdoor lives.

Like other military MREs I talked about, XMREs are pre-cooked, nutritionally balanced, lightweight, easy to carry, and pretty delicious. 

I’m a big carnivore, but this is where I’ll surprise you and gush with feelings when I talk about XMRE’s lovely Vegetarian Taco Pasta. It almost reminds me of young Bonnie – innocent, pure, and round as a tortilla.

The veggie taco pasta meal comes with:

·         Flameless heater

·         Main meal

·         Italian breadsticks (a nice break from crackers!)

·         Jalapeno cheese spread

·         Oatmeal cookie

·         Beverage powder – Lemon lime

·         Sunflower kernels

·         Accessories – wet towel, coffee, coffee creamer, sugar, salt and pepper, napkin, and spoon

Beans, peppers, pasta, and whatever other vegetables are stacked inside this mushy-looking meal are well combined to send a pleasurable sensation along your taste buds. 

I guess MRE producers are creating a new form of art with their great-tasting meals that look revolting.

Another great thing about XMRE is that they offer Kosher and Halal MRE varieties.

8. Mountain House – Beef Stew (Civilian)

Though technically not an MRE because it’s not pre-cooked but freeze-dried, the Beef Stew by Mountain House is among the best MREs for hunting – precisely because it’s freeze-dried and lighter than moisture-retaining MREs, plus it’s VERY tasty.

Regular MREs are too heavy for a backpack, especially if you’re off hiking for several days and need a number of meals.

The Beef Stew comes in a lightweight pouch that provides two servings for lean, athletic hikers and barely one for your sturdy Ferret.

The only sad thing about Mountain House adventure meals is that they don’t have any side dishes. What you find in that main dish pouch, that’s it. 

But again, that’s the whole point of lightweight meals during a hike, so, think about that when you choose hiking as your favorite survival hobby.

But in all seriousness, the Beef Stew is yummy. It’s a mix of diced beef, potatoes, carrots, and peas that you need to rehydrate with hot water, wait for 10 minutes, and then devour, feeling extreme happiness spreading from your tummy.

9. Wornick Eversafe – Vegetable Lasagna (Civilian)

This Vegetable Lasagna is among the best MREs for camping. Why? Because it’s lightweight, but still delicious. 

Unlike the lightweight, freeze-dried option for hikers, it comes with a beverage powder, crackers with peanut butter or jelly spread, coffee, candy, and the heater bag.  You may also get a Tabasco sauce, French vanilla instant cappuccino, peach mango applesauce, and lemonade.

I already have one veggie MRE on this list, so I won’t go into detail about the vegetable lasagna. It’s really good, that’s for sure, even if it looks more like pasta than lasagna.

It’s certainly not lagging behind most other lasagnas you tried in your life. Plus, it has beans in it, so there you go for your daily protein requirement. What’s not to like!

10. MRE Star – New Orleans Gumbo with Chicken (Civilian)

Saved for last, this one’s the best tasting commercial MRE, according to Ferret’s fat, food-loving tummy. Not better than Chili Mac or Chicken Burrito, but they’re military-style MREs. 

The New Orleans Gumbo with Chicken is definitely on my bug out bag survival essentials checklist.

The contents of the gumbo with chicken are pretty much the same as in other MRE packaging:

·         The gumbo main dish

·         Oatmeal cookie

·         Crackers

·         Peanut butter

·         Flameless heater

·         Toasted corn nuts

·         Grape beverage

·         Accessories

What IS gumbo, anyway? It’s not too jumbo, but just the right-sized mush of chicken meat, rice, beans, carrots, peppers, and maybe something else but unrecognizable to me.

When I add enough salt and pepper, it’s a bliss to my sense of taste. 

Now add some toasted corn nuts in and it only gets better. Trust your uncle Ferret when it comes to fine dining while anticipating the end of the world.

End your meal with the oatmeal cookie dipped in that fine, black, rich survival coffee, and it all ends well.  

So, there you go.

If you’re anticipating a disaster (read: mother-in-law) that may keep you from civilization for a while, MREs are a good choice of survival food.

In most other cases, I recommend burgers, roasted boars, and even Bonnie’s mac ‘n’ cheese – but not every single day.